Front Runners

If this is the best the republicans have to offer ... run Forrest run ...

Mitt Romney. Apparently a sharp and successful businessman. Although a "conservative" some folks say Obamacare looks a lot like the Romneycare enacted in Massachusetts which some also claim is a dismal failure. I can't put my finger on it, but there's something about Mitt that my instincts say no no no. Sort of like the way the hair stands up on the back of your neck in the subway when you're uncomfortably close to the man in a dirty raincoat fiddling with something in his pocket.

Newt Gingrich. Personal and political life too messy, 4 marriages, adulterous affairs, sleazy, 84 ethics violations as house speaker which he managed to squirm out of all but one and for that was "reprimanded". To hear Newt tell it he was the victim of a "coup" attempt to remove him as speaker. But claims he has asked forgiveness from god for his personal sins and is a changed man (winky wink). (Why is it most men who claim religion do so after they have spent most of their life as marauding barbarians and "get closer" to god only when age and Viagra no longer work for them?)

Sarah Palin. LOL. A perennial debutante. Couldn't finish her last year as Alaska governor because of lusting for the camera, the book deal, the documentary, putting foxiness in Foxnews contributor, etc. Had to strike while the greed iron was hot, understandable, but certainly not what a sane person would want in the first woman president. Besides, her voice makes the ear canal cringe.

Huckabee not running. Thank god.

Ron Paul. At 75 Ron should be enjoying retirement not humping a campaign trail to the White House.

Donald Trump. Hmmm. Nothing would be accomplished as the world would be focused on his puzzling 'do don't and anal sphincter mouth.

Tim Pawlenty. ....Who? Just another former businessman turned political addict with 5 terms in Minnesota house and 8 years as governor. An "evangelical Christian" meaning he believes the Bible is authoritative, has had a born-again experience, and shares the message of faith. (Not much in the news regarding Pawlenty's ethics and accountability problem with appointment of Vicki Tigwell as chairwoman of MAC, a $1 billion airport expansion project, back in 2003. She stepped down in 2006 citing - you guessed it - family and personal reasons.)

Arnold. Can't run because of citizenship issue but would if he could. And it would have saved his marriage, at least until after his presidency. Like so many Hollywoodies, his marriage was near perfect until it wasn't.

So, unless some other termite crawls out of the woodwork - in 2012, to borrow from Charlie, Obama will be a "winner," a warlock with tiger blood and all that... until 2016 when he leaves office and writes a bestseller, Audacity of bin Laden Down.