There Are Black Conservatives Out There Hoax

Who is the biggest glibbest Black liar for the neocons? After reading an article by Jude Wanniski and with a unanimous vote here at KAB Ms. Condi Rice wins. As we enter February and Black History month, the top player in "There Are Black Conservatives Out There Hoax", without question, goes to Dr. Rice. The Secretary of State can nab her award (a bottle of Ms. Butterworth syrup, Aunt Jemima pancake mix, and a slap up side the back of the head) personally from me here at the KAB office.

Runners-up in the growing coterie of Black conservative pretenders are too numerous to list so choices were made from each category which include, but not limited to political office holders, speakers, journalists, Bible thumpers, front groups, and the like, some of the firsts in the field of intelligent Blacks to suck-up to the hardright's payroll as the neocons began grooming conservative tokens 3+ decades ago. Runners-up receive only the slap up side the back of the head.

Alan Keyes (errand boy for white politicians) and Colin "Me Lie" Powell. 'Nuff said.

Clarence "Coke Can" Thomas. Recipient of Affirmative Action but now against it, here come da judge testalying. Thomas admits to listening to Rush Limbaugh radio and having an epiphany....Imagine if you will...another dimension...where "Pills" Limbaugh is illuminating compassionate conservatism...and Thomas crossed over into...the right zone. Gives me the shudders.

Ward Connerly aka "one of the country's leading opponents of Affirmative Action". Founder of American Civil Rights Institute, funded largely by the rightwing Bradley Foundation. Hacks as one of Townhall's Black conservative columnists.

Thomas Sowell - Townhall hackster, rightwing peddler of rightwing studies by rightwing think tanks that tell us things like: white Americans believe (no duh) Black Americans are getting more than their fair share. For Sowell, protest is not the sign of a healthy democracy but a "sign of a spreading sickness in a society too wimpish to insist that law and order matter and too mushy-minded to see that self-indulgence at other people's expense is not idealism." (Law/order, self-indulgence/other people's expense = conservative code words for black folks in the hood.)

Ken Hamblin aka "the Black Avenger" on radio, columnist, author, described by the NYT as "intellectual brawler sometimes called the black Rush Limbaugh." Hamlin insists that America offers opportunities to anyone who follows traditional values of right and wrong. Against Affirmative Action. Hamblin favors the terms "poverty pimps" to describe Black urban politicians, and memes like "welfare queen" and “egg-sucking dog liberals”. Hamblin states he'll "gladly invade Mexico to stop the country from dumping its lower-class citizens on us." If he's avenging on behalf of anyone, other than himself, I'd like to know who.

Randall Kennedy for authoring "Nigger: The Strange Career of a Troublesome Word" and other books giving strange aid and comfort to the white conservative status quo, they need not feel any "white guilt", transmigrating the I'm-okay-I-got-mine into his next existance. Bad Karma Randy. As if Blacks don't have enough to worry about, Blacks need to show compassion to all the whites feeling guilty out there. Sounds like a rehash of 1960's white suburbia guilt pyschobabble. Kennedy's book convinced Andy Rooney with the logic that the N-word "is being renovated" and "the term can be a sign of affection". Rooney seems to think that the best "way to get rid of words like nigger" and "all the contemptible ideas that go with it" is by using it. Now who would Andy affectionately use the word for? What a spin, this earns Rooney the only non-Black biggest glibbest liar slap up side the head.

BAEO (Black Alliance for Education Options) receiving millions from, again, the rightwing Bradley Foundation, the foundation also funded "The Bell Curve." BAEO at the Taxpayer Trough too. BAEO will provide training if you want to open a local chapter in your city so you too can just overwhelm parents with great quality education choices. The money BAEO has spent on print/video ads, administration costs, symposiums, empowerment campaigns, speaking expenses endeavoring to promote the party line, could've paid for quality education for Black children in several states.

Bishop Sedgwick Daniels - founder and pastor of The Holy Redeemer Institutional Church of God in Christ in Milwaukee since 1986. In 2002 Bush personally visited Bishop Daniels--who voted for Clinton and Gore--and Bush awarded him a faith-based $1.5 million grant. In the fall of 2004 Daniels's face appeared on Republican fliers in Wisconsin, endorsing Bush as the man who "shares our views." Daniels heard the calling of a powerful force, a voice from way up high, a voice BOOMING from a higher authority....the White House paymasters? Praise the Lord.

That's KAB's short list of the many "Black conservatives" shouting the joys of Black conservatism, all the way to the bank.